What to do when you can’t tell them to “shove it” on their opinions

Some of us have heard the quote “Some people will only like you if you fit inside their box. Don’t be afraid to shove that box up their a$$.” (Unknown author)

As much as this quote is relatable, shoving that box up their a$$, while possibly desirable, might not always be an option.

When planning events (especially something as grand as a wedding), people seem to suddenly have opinions you weren’t expecting. They might feel like you need to do your event one specific way, or if you don’t have this one awkward tradition, it’s not real. 

I’m here to tell you that if they aren’t paying, then they don’t get a say: you have the power. 

That said, I advise my couples to treat situations like this carefully to maintain their relationships. 

One way to do this is to say:

“Thanks for taking an interest. We’ll take that into consideration when we’re at that point in planning.” 

Or

“Oh, we did it differently, and there isn’t any going back now. The money’s been spent.”

Or simply,

“Thanks for the input, we really appreciate it, but we can’t afford to do that right now.”

(This works well for child-free weddings for those folks complaining about that fact).

If they’re helping a little bit (or a lot), they will likely get more of a say in what happens at the event. In this case, have an open discussion about what they can/cannot have a say in before they give the money. 

If they’ve already given the money, going back to that first tactic of “Thanks for taking an interest…” can go a long way. 

Having trouble navigating these kinds of issues? A wedding planner is skilled and knowledgeable in this area and can help. Let’s chat if you want a little personalized guidance! ^_^

With love,

Katie